Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Germany Through My lens
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| Three colors of the season-Red,Green and Yellow |
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| If the Guard sleeps then the thief is alert |
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| Old Market Church |
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| Letter A in the sky by the Maschsee lake |
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| Brandenburg Gate,Berlin |
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| The Berlin Wall |
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| Bunkers From WW II |
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| Marienburg Castle |
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Our Mr.Right,The Right One
If you are my friend on facebook then till now with all my updates of status and photos you would know that my mami is a German.
Now after 15 years of their marriage,we guys never really look at the fact the she is not ''Indian'' and not that typical bahu or mami you would want.But now it doesn't matter and in this case she get a safe ground from my mama too who himself is not the typical mama,as he knows not even a single word of Hindi and also considered himself American and not Indian.
His response to the manger at an Indian restaurant in Germany asking him if he was a Indian,while we guys were having dinner was that ''I was just born in India''.And then he pointed his finger at me saying that''am not but she is the real Indian''.And i continued talking to the manager in Hindi.
As i was saying that now its not a important thing for us to think about her nationality or religion and earlier also i didn't because is was too young to really think about it but others are always like ''oye your mami is a foreigner and even your cousins are like angraze''
Our family was very chilled out about the fact that my mama was getting married to a foreigner,nani was just more than glad that at least he is finally getting married.
That was our side of story and i wondered what my mami's parents thought.My mama was a foreigner to them and they just might have had a stereotype about us Indians and might have resisted their marriage.
And i finally asked my mami,starting with general questions of how long they knew each other before they decided to get married,how did they meet and all...
She answered as she cooked dinner for us and then i asked if her parents were apprehensive about her getting married to an Indian?
She said no,not at all...and said that her parents were also glad that at least she is getting married.
And then she said something that you hear in movies so many times,but there i was listening to these so called glorious words that have been true in real life and these guys had made it work for 15 years.
And she said ''when you know he is the right one,you just know and then nothing matters.If you think he is not the one then just don't do it''
And i smiled a heart filled smile just the way silly girls do when they hear it in movies and then take a deep breath.
And she continued saying that we know how to live on our own and we just knew it.
Now after 15 years of their marriage,we guys never really look at the fact the she is not ''Indian'' and not that typical bahu or mami you would want.But now it doesn't matter and in this case she get a safe ground from my mama too who himself is not the typical mama,as he knows not even a single word of Hindi and also considered himself American and not Indian.
His response to the manger at an Indian restaurant in Germany asking him if he was a Indian,while we guys were having dinner was that ''I was just born in India''.And then he pointed his finger at me saying that''am not but she is the real Indian''.And i continued talking to the manager in Hindi.
As i was saying that now its not a important thing for us to think about her nationality or religion and earlier also i didn't because is was too young to really think about it but others are always like ''oye your mami is a foreigner and even your cousins are like angraze''
Our family was very chilled out about the fact that my mama was getting married to a foreigner,nani was just more than glad that at least he is finally getting married.
That was our side of story and i wondered what my mami's parents thought.My mama was a foreigner to them and they just might have had a stereotype about us Indians and might have resisted their marriage.
And i finally asked my mami,starting with general questions of how long they knew each other before they decided to get married,how did they meet and all...
She answered as she cooked dinner for us and then i asked if her parents were apprehensive about her getting married to an Indian?
She said no,not at all...and said that her parents were also glad that at least she is getting married.
And then she said something that you hear in movies so many times,but there i was listening to these so called glorious words that have been true in real life and these guys had made it work for 15 years.
And she said ''when you know he is the right one,you just know and then nothing matters.If you think he is not the one then just don't do it''
And i smiled a heart filled smile just the way silly girls do when they hear it in movies and then take a deep breath.
And she continued saying that we know how to live on our own and we just knew it.
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| Mama and Mami |
Saturday, September 4, 2010
The Dry Flower String Lights
Ok,so the story really started 5 years ago in Bangkok.After my 10th board exams,me and my parents went to Bangkok for vacation.
It was a dual purpose trip,dad had some work in Yangon (Rangoon) in Burma,officially known as the Union of Myanmar,so he clubbed it with Bangkok so that i can't nag him for an year that he has not taken us out for any vacation...
Malls there were huge,you could buy nice watches for 300 baht or nice bags or phone accessories of very good quality but at low prices and there were other many unique things
There was a stall that was selling beautiful dry flowers.These were different from the ones we generally saw in India that time.Warm colors,maroon,yellow,brown...thin texture,details of leaf's veins...
While the sales girl was explaining all this and while my parents were busy bargaining ( just the way in which Russell Peter's describes in this act between Indian and a Chinese shopkeeper ''BE A MAN'' lol ) i had my eyes set on these strings lights made of same material.
It was expensive i remember,which made it difficult for me to ask my parents to buy it for me.
They are gonna think am silly,so much for just these lights,you get lights for 100 or 200 rs during Diwali,forget the money part,why would you any ways want them? they would ask i thought...
And generally also if you think too much,it becomes a little difficult to ask your parent to buy something.
We went away,but i kept going to the same stall,the sales girl knew i had my eye on it and she was just waiting for me to call out to it,as she get sparing water on the flowers to attract me more.
Finally i gathered courage to ask my mom to see it and if she approves then buy it.After a few initial troubles we finally brought.
As soon as we came back home,they were the first thing that i got out of my bag.
They were all pressed and closed.I sprayed water on them and they opened up again.
I had put these string of lights on the corners of my dressing table in my room.I would make sure to light it put when someone would come to our home.
It was in my room for a long time,until mom decided that it looks shabby and its difficult to manage as it gets all dirty with layers of dirt on it.
She we took them off to clear it and kept them somewhere from where it was difficult to find them.But after a long search,i found them today in the store room on the terrace.
And as i got it down to my room,my mom's first reaction was ''now don't put this in your room again,they don't look nice''
I said nothing,nor did she say anything because she knew it,that am gonna put them put again.
And yes i did! but changed its resting location.Now it was up on the pelmet...
This place is better,its more structured i think now.Hammered few oil pins too keep it in line and to support it to help resist the anarchy of gravity...
It feels like its looking upon me...
Right now sitting in my room,with my laptop in front of me and these lights on the left side,i look at them repeatedly and yes! i like what i see.
''Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence
In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
'Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence''
''The sound of silence'' by Simon and Garfunkel
It was a dual purpose trip,dad had some work in Yangon (Rangoon) in Burma,officially known as the Union of Myanmar,so he clubbed it with Bangkok so that i can't nag him for an year that he has not taken us out for any vacation...
Malls there were huge,you could buy nice watches for 300 baht or nice bags or phone accessories of very good quality but at low prices and there were other many unique things
There was a stall that was selling beautiful dry flowers.These were different from the ones we generally saw in India that time.Warm colors,maroon,yellow,brown...thin texture,details of leaf's veins...
The best feature was that they could change shape,if you press them together they would close and if you wanted them to look all full and blossomed up,you could do that too.
The way of doing so was the most interesting one.You had to spray water on it.And when you did the flowers would open again...
While the sales girl was explaining all this and while my parents were busy bargaining ( just the way in which Russell Peter's describes in this act between Indian and a Chinese shopkeeper ''BE A MAN'' lol ) i had my eyes set on these strings lights made of same material.
Yellow lights,nude color flowers and green colored wire...
It was expensive i remember,which made it difficult for me to ask my parents to buy it for me.
They are gonna think am silly,so much for just these lights,you get lights for 100 or 200 rs during Diwali,forget the money part,why would you any ways want them? they would ask i thought...
And generally also if you think too much,it becomes a little difficult to ask your parent to buy something.
We went away,but i kept going to the same stall,the sales girl knew i had my eye on it and she was just waiting for me to call out to it,as she get sparing water on the flowers to attract me more.
Finally i gathered courage to ask my mom to see it and if she approves then buy it.After a few initial troubles we finally brought.
As soon as we came back home,they were the first thing that i got out of my bag.
They were all pressed and closed.I sprayed water on them and they opened up again.
I had put these string of lights on the corners of my dressing table in my room.I would make sure to light it put when someone would come to our home.
It was in my room for a long time,until mom decided that it looks shabby and its difficult to manage as it gets all dirty with layers of dirt on it.
She we took them off to clear it and kept them somewhere from where it was difficult to find them.But after a long search,i found them today in the store room on the terrace.
And as i got it down to my room,my mom's first reaction was ''now don't put this in your room again,they don't look nice''
I said nothing,nor did she say anything because she knew it,that am gonna put them put again.
And yes i did! but changed its resting location.Now it was up on the pelmet...
It feels like its looking upon me...
In my room,these are my stars,this is my Venus,this is my guiding light.
These will give the feeling of protection when they will glow at night as i sleep,this will give me the feeling of light in my life...
Right now sitting in my room,with my laptop in front of me and these lights on the left side,i look at them repeatedly and yes! i like what i see.
The room is dark with only these lights,i can hear the cricket by my window side as i lower the volume of my laptop playing ''The song Sound of Silence''
''Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence
In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
'Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence''
''The sound of silence'' by Simon and Garfunkel
Monday, August 23, 2010
A Beautiful Morning
Just one of those days when you are up very late at night talking to a friend on phone.
After keeping the phone down one decides to stay up for some more time and see the sunrise.
There is something about watching the sky turn blue from black...
To hear the first chirp of the birds...
To see some old people out for a walk...
I in my own right have always felt proud of myself to be up the whole night and then being able to see the sunrise.
Was already up till 4 or so talking to a friend,the weather was great as it had rained throughout the day and earlier that night too.
The sight tempted me to click some photos and then i did...
The colors that the nature reflected this morning was great.
Yellow street lights,green plants and blue sky...
Rain drops on the wind chime and plants
Just really liked the blue and green tones in the pictures.
The pictures came out nice,the morning was beautiful and the breeze was fresh,it felt like a mornings at some hill station.
Loving the monsoon,the rains day and night...
''Well, I love a rainy night
I love a rainy night
I love to hear the thunder
Watch the lightning
When it lights up the sky
You know it makes me feel good
Well, I love a rainy night
It's such a beautiful sight
I love to feel the rain
On my face
Taste the rain on my lips
In the moonlight shadow
Showers washed
All my cares away
I wake up to a sunny day
'Cos I love a rainy night
Yeah, I love a rainy night
Well, I love a rainy night
Well, I love a rainy night''
-EDDIE RABBIT 's song I Love A Rainy Night
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Coldness in the Summer season
There is something about the smell in the air today,it feels like its October already.It feels like am in 6th grade and diwali is round the corner.
It feels like its Autumn holidays already.
I can smell the winter breeze.
I can smell the fear in me.
I foresee the victory of good over bad,but who stands where is yet a trail to be passed...
Is it the end of summers ? or it just my fever that keeps my body hot but my surroundings cold.
Or is it just the coldness of the situation?
(Painting by Robert McGinnis)
It feels like its Autumn holidays already.
I can smell the winter breeze.
I can smell the fear in me.
I foresee the victory of good over bad,but who stands where is yet a trail to be passed...
Is it the end of summers ? or it just my fever that keeps my body hot but my surroundings cold.
Or is it just the coldness of the situation?
'Tis the last rose of summer
Left blooming alone;
All her lovely companions
Are faded and gone;
No flower of her kindred,
No rosebud is nigh,
To reflect back her blushes,
To give sigh for sigh.
All her lovely companions
Are faded and gone;
No flower of her kindred,
No rosebud is nigh,
To reflect back her blushes,
To give sigh for sigh.
I'll not leave thee, thou lone one!
To pine on the stem;
Since the lovely are sleeping,
Go, sleep thou with them.
Thus kindly I scatter,
Thy leaves o'er the bed,
Where thy mates of the garden
Lie scentless and dead.
To pine on the stem;
Since the lovely are sleeping,
Go, sleep thou with them.
Thus kindly I scatter,
Thy leaves o'er the bed,
Where thy mates of the garden
Lie scentless and dead.
So soon may I follow,
When friendships decay,
From Love's shining circle
The gems drop away.
When true hearts lie withered
And fond ones are flown,
Oh! who would inhabit,
This bleak world alone? '
When friendships decay,
From Love's shining circle
The gems drop away.
When true hearts lie withered
And fond ones are flown,
Oh! who would inhabit,
This bleak world alone? '
-THE LAST ROSE OF SUMMER by THOMAS MOORE
Thomas Moore was an Irish poet, singer, songwriter and entertainer.
Moore's writings range from lyric to satire, from prose romance to history and biography. His popular Irish Melodies appeared in ten parts between 1807 and 1835.
(Painting by Robert McGinnis)
Monday, August 2, 2010
The day I got to know about 'Robert Mc Ginnis'
But most of the parents now call it a ''necessary evil'' as many theorist called forth the same reason for formation of states and government...
Kids used computer more for games than to do some research work
And now we use it for quick mails,social networking,music and movie downloads...but parents scold no more as they do the same (my mom doesn't scold me any more for long hours on laptop as she does the same)
I had a similar view about my time spent on my laptop,it was about mails, facebook,downloading songs...
But in these past few days i have got to know so many things that i wanted to know through facebook.
Facebook can sometimes work as efficient as a google search page.
You just need to have the right friends.
Going from one link to another,one page to another...
This can lead you to discover many things,the movies that you should watch,the institute you should or should not join...
The most amazing thing that i got to know today was about ROBERT MC GINNIES.
His work is pure beauty,art in real sense.
He is an American artist and illustrator.
He is known for his illustrations of over 1200 paperback of pulp fiction books and for many famous movies like Breakfast at Tiffany's
and many James Bond movies
Most of these pulp magazines had a woman protagonist exhibiting traits of BDSM.
Each lady in the painting is beautiful,sexy and full of attitude...
I wish i was a creation of Robert McGennis
I miss my college days,as it rains today (31st july)
College is over,now i wait at home for a new phase in my life.
Online on facebook, i read my friend's status updates.
Most of them talk of rain.I read my junior's update, they all thank their friends for the fun they had today in the rain.
These update remind me of my days in college when it use to rain...
As it rains today,i miss my college days.
The careful steps we use to take to keep ourselves straight.
Looking out through the windows as the class goes on.
Rushing out of the class as soon as the teacher gives us attendance and leaves the class.
Rushing down the stairs into the open air.
Closing my eyes and feeling each drop of rain on my face.
With each drop, the length of my smile increases in size. There are few days of rains which i will never forget...
The walk to nescafe for coffee,jumping from one point to another on the wet ground so as to we don't fall on the wet muddy ground.
I remember sitting out of the college gate near the chai walla and bher puri walla with friends waiting for our maggie and patty.
The weather was awesome and we all were in a good mood,laughing,talking and pulling each others leg.
Suddenly it started raining,we continued to eat our patty,few drops on our plate,water mixed with tomato sauce.
Then it started pouring read hard.Then it was all about ''my new phone is getting wet'' ,''shit my bag and books'' and another sitting in the car said ''you girls wana go for a drive?''
Bags thrown in the car,2 out of 5 of us go for a drive (only 1 wanted to,but the car owner was not willing to leave the car)
The class starts in 15 minutes,the careful walk from college gate to the class would have taken 5 minutes.
'You guys go,we will go to the class and tell mam that you will be late''
bhai calls for us to take our maggie before we could cancel it.
Maggie truly has some magic,you just can't resist.
Silver plastic plate half full with maggie and half with rain water,but still we ate it.
The best part was that my hands were dirty,a friend was making me eat it with her hand in the most sweetest way,how could i have said no to that...
And now with all the craziest, we rush for the class.
Bhai shouts '' paise?''
Bags in the car,car in the traffic,new cell phone in the wet pocket,sms in the new cell phone,''mam has come,come fast to the class'' in the sms...
Digging in our pockets,being able to pay the maggie walla and rushing to the class with still no bags.
Entering the class drenched and dirty,the happiness on our face and in our heart that would not wash off.
Asking for pen and paper for classmates sitting in front of us.
Our guy friend coming in class with 3 ladies bags...ha ha ha!!!
That laugh in the class and high5 that we passed,i will never forget those rainy days that we had in our graduation class...
Friday, January 15, 2010
Found Myself As I Search for You
I have been trying soo hard to make you mine,
make you like me,love me,want me.. that i just forgot to be myself and the reason why i started doing so.
I was blinded by what i saw or what i wanted to see and by what everyone says one wants..
It was a foolishness because i thought it was necessary to play by society's rule..
Now i don't know who am i in front of you,
is this me or the image of me which you wanted to see.
I don't remember myself or the me which you liked or the me which liked you..
I guess i was only foolish and impulsive,scared and lonely,sad and alone..
It was not me which you liked,it was that me which you liked that liked you..
It was that me who was wandering with an open heart and soul only with some need for acceptance and approval.
You don't love me,you just love this idea of me which we created,which i thought you wanted..
This idea was a mold that we created..i was just a clay ready to shape myself ,trying to fit into it perfectly well.
We both just love this image of us that we created to satisfy ourselves..only as a beggar pretends to be blind to satisfy his reason for what he does and to make us satisfy that we are doing a good deed,just to satisfy the effort of the movement that we do.
Now am left with no reasons ,so i guess i should not try to build that image i should not try to make you mine..
Searching for you,trying for you,
I have answered many of my own questions..
Now i should search for me,the real me.
Must go out on a walk and must take a look around and find myself that satisfies me and not anyone else..
I found and made myself what i wanted to be..
and yes this is REAL ME..
god for someone,a friend for someone,a crush for someone,a love for someone,
a snob for someone,a loser for someone,a sister to someone,a daughter to my parents..
If you like this real me,then i guess i dnt mind trying again to make you mine,
as we search for the real you,the real me and the real us.
make you like me,love me,want me.. that i just forgot to be myself and the reason why i started doing so.
I was blinded by what i saw or what i wanted to see and by what everyone says one wants..
It was a foolishness because i thought it was necessary to play by society's rule..
Now i don't know who am i in front of you,
I don't remember myself or the me which you liked or the me which liked you..
I guess i was only foolish and impulsive,scared and lonely,sad and alone..
It was not me which you liked,it was that me which you liked that liked you..
It was that me who was wandering with an open heart and soul only with some need for acceptance and approval.
You don't love me,you just love this idea of me which we created,which i thought you wanted..
This idea was a mold that we created..i was just a clay ready to shape myself ,trying to fit into it perfectly well.
We both just love this image of us that we created to satisfy ourselves..only as a beggar pretends to be blind to satisfy his reason for what he does and to make us satisfy that we are doing a good deed,just to satisfy the effort of the movement that we do.
Now am left with no reasons ,so i guess i should not try to build that image i should not try to make you mine..
Searching for you,trying for you,
I have answered many of my own questions..
Now i should search for me,the real me.
Must go out on a walk and must take a look around and find myself that satisfies me and not anyone else..
I found and made myself what i wanted to be..
and yes this is REAL ME..
god for someone,a friend for someone,a crush for someone,a love for someone,
a snob for someone,a loser for someone,a sister to someone,a daughter to my parents..
If you like this real me,then i guess i dnt mind trying again to make you mine,
as we search for the real you,the real me and the real us.
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